These moments are a breath of warm air in your lungs after the coldest depths of winter, that golden ray of sunshine striking your face after a dark and gloomy day. They feed you, turning your skin luminescent with life, creasing your lips into a fond smile when you sit alone in a crowded place.
Sometimes you forget about who you were before the worries came, before insecurity settled angrily into your gut, breeding fear of the unknown. That isn’t you, it’s just a virus, a feeling you’re unused to. Hold onto those memories of firelight crackling amongst the trees, warming your legs as you huddle on a cold night in the mountains.
Remember how it danced beneath the cold moon, shedding a circle of warmth in the toneless woods. How you huddled in the chill, together, bundled up against the warring of the wind in the trees. Remember that tunnel view between the peaks, that lake stretching out endless into the distance, as you watched her dance in the cool morning air, baring her skin to the beauty of the wild, breathing it all in.
Let those fears simmer out inside of you, purge them from your body and reclaim your confidence, because what you fear only pushes you away from those who enjoy you as you. They don’t understand that inside of you, your mast is broken, and you sit stranded on an island unbeknownst to you, in a land far from paradise. Remember those mornings waking up to sunlight filtering through the blinds, casting bars of pale yellow on the wall. Of the giddy, warm light in the kitchen, nursing the warmth of a mug between your hands.
You are only who you are, no more, no less. Don’t lose sight of it. Don’t lose the mountains, the adventures, that confidence born from wanting more. Don’t settle for feeling unsure about yourself. That isn’t you. Keep chasing those sunrises, keep searching for hidden waterfalls, for salty, stolen kisses on overgrown trails.
The insecurities that leak into your actions destroy more than just you, they destroy what you’ve created. Remember those moments in the wild, remember who you are, and you’ll make it through. Remember, even when a bad month turns into two, that what you’ve already accomplished, what is still there, is nothing to worry about. Remember…